Mean and Nasty the saga continues

The teen drama continues.  Mainly disrespect and attitude. I've gotten to the point very quickly where I don't care.  I LOVE my niece but she has proven that she is going to do what she wants to anyways. We go round and round with her. She doesn't like us to say anything to her at all.  She stays gone all day long..Comes home to sleep and gets up early the next morning to head to her boyfriends. Her job is upset with her because he hangs out there.  They have cut her hours back to one day a week.  They called her in today and I let her know..she never responded. Her boyfriend thinks I should be ok with her staying the night and that she should be able to stay out as late as she wants. She worships the ground he walks on.


I had been holding this all in.  It has really been weighing heavy on my heart.  So I decided to give her father a call and let him know what was going on..With everything.  I had asked him what he thought about letting her go out on her own since that is what she really wants. I told him about her boyfriends age. That had really been weighing heavy on my heart. She didn't want him to know but I wasn't going to Lie for her either.  He took it surprisingly well...and I felt such a huge relief off of my shoulders. He said he would think about it and get back with me.  In the mean time our niece decided she was not going to come home one night. I text her several times. Her curfew is 11pm.  Finally at 12:30 she calls and said she "accidentally" fell asleep. I told her she needed to get home and no response.  The next morning they showed up and were gone before anyone was up. Of course she would have gotten an ear full from me. So I let her dad know about all of that and he said I had his blessing to let her go.  That if she wanted to be emancipated and live on her own she had his blessing.  I think the only way she will ever learn is by going to The School of hard Knocks. I told her she was not allowed to stay at her boyfriends and the snotty response I got from her was that we were going to treat her like an adult by making her pay for her own things but it wasn't ok for her to stay at her boyfriends even if it was an accident. She said she was not going to walk home alone at 12:30am..Its so funny because any other time she most definitely would have and I would have picked her up.

I have tried to be supportive and loving and the only place it has gotten me is used.  Before I knew it I was buying him food at Taco Bell and taking him to work. Going to get a coffee and ending up getting them one. All they know how to do is use other people and I'm done. He is 22 live with his Grandma and has nothing to show for him self.  He has been suspended from work twice already.  She failed one of her summer school classes because it was to hard. She won't go anywhere with out him.  She was invited to go see her dad for a week and didn't want to be away from her BF for that long.  She said he had a "BAD" feeling that something would happen and her dad would make her stay. She had burnt bridges with every one. Even her own little sister. She went through her clothes and I asked if she was going to give them to her little sis.  She said she was going to let his sisters pick through them and then give the rest to her...Wow..

I could go on and on..But right now she is trying to get her stuff together so she can get moved out. We told her as long as she is here she has rules but now we are thinking we need to get her to move sooner.  She hasn't been home the last 3 nights and we don't want to deal with the stress anymore. I worry when she isn't here and I can't sleep. I love her but I have to let her go so I can focus on my family. I know at one time we were all teens and said mean things..but even I had my limits.

Mean and Nasty quotes:
 They are just mad she is gone because they want her there to clean house and take care of the kids.
Ummm, no I don't ask for her help...

Her dog pooped in one of the boys rooms...she said to Mark.."Well I'm going to tell you what everyone else tells me, keep your stuff put up or your door closed."

She insists on leaving her door unlocked. Blake goes in there if it isn't locked.  She said she shouldn't have to keep her stuff put up because its her room.  Hello you live with 3 little boys..If I don't keep mystuff put up it gets messed up.

I don't have any reason to be home.  I told her she isn't ever home and she gets a lot of freedom.  She said that wasn't reason enough.

I told her to respect her boss. She said she isn't a kiss a**

Where have I been??

Sorry I keep coming up MIA.  My home computer has decided to work when it wants to so I have to borrow my hubby's when I can.  He uses it for work and its hard to sneak away. It seems most days he doesn't have to be on it until I need it..but thats ok.  I have been getting a lot more done around the house and not getting on facebook as much.  Lately Facebook seems sort of blah to me anyways.  Some days I get crabby and don't want to see the mindless jokes or the over posters who POST everything.  There are days when I don't have much to say so I don't.  I try to post good and positive things that will hopefully affect me like they do others.

So where have I been ...well I've been swimming a  lot lately and I'm excited about that.  Normally I don't enjoy doing those sort of things because its hard work.  Packing everyone up, making sure we don't forget anything. Getting so dirty I can't stand it...but lately I seem to be over that and have enjoyed it.  Our friends Larry and Kat live in Mohave Valley so we go down to either the river with them or to their home owners association pool.  Its been great.  They are children people so I get to enjoy my self not chasing the kids the entire time.  Which in that respect the kids have LOVED going and have been SO good.  We have a great cove we go to off of the river and its just perfect.

I applied for financial aid and am thinking about going to cosmetology school. I have wanted to go forever and ever and have really been feeling down on myself that I didn't have a career.  My hubby brought me a pamphlet from All Beauty College in Bullhead City and we started talking about it a lot more. So I decided to apply and see where I get. Now I just have to figure out rides and daycare for my kiddos and I think its a go.  If I start August  I will be done in July of next year.  I'm excited, nervous and really hoping it works out.
It isn't set in stone yet, but something is going to happen very soon!

Love your kids when they are little!

Hopefully all the love a good morals you drown them with will pay off and help you through the teen years. I wonder some times what kind of person I would have been with out the love of such good parents. I see the troubled teens of today and it really scares me. Girls are learning junk younger and younger and it is really scary. I think the good parents are the untrusting parents.  Check and double check..If its think able they are doing it. our good kids are learning from the bad ones and its scary!

Mean and nasties

I figured for your viewing pleasure that I would start posting some of the "Awesome" things that my niece has said to us since she moved in.  Right now she doesn't feel that she should have any rules or regulations.  Last night I told her that we give her a lot of freedom and she needs to respect our curfew times.  During the week she has to be home by 10pm and on weekends its 11pm.  I think that is fair considering during the day she is pretty much permitted to do as she pleases. 

So since we have implemented the curfew she has all but broken the rules.  At first she would come home at 10, but stay outside for 2 hours visiting with her boyfriend.  So we changed it to where she needs to be in the house by this time. OK so she was in the house but her boyfriend would be here for 2 hours with her.  So once again we changed the rule.  She comes in he goes home..Done end of story...So last night I was telling her about all of her freedom and how as it is she is never home. She tells me that she doesn't feel like she needs to be home since she is going to summer school and working etc.  She said "This sounds bad but, I don't have any reason to be home."  Wow..Really? your boyfriend is that much more important to you than your family...Just tear my heart out now...and PS if any  of your family ever comes to you asking if your 16 year old niece can come stay with you..RUN! Don't do it, its not worth it and it will cause nothing but heartache. I know as a teenager I wasn't perfect but I would never have said anything so mean and hurtful.
The saga shall continue...

Sometimes I'm a cry baby

Today was preschool graduation.  I'm such a cry baby.  I teared up during and after. I cried some more after and when I had to say good bye.  I can't help but be sad. I will really miss our preschool teacher. Granted good things are coming for her. Saying good bye just stinks!
I try to be strong and I just can't.  Its so frustrating.  I don't like being such an over emotional ball of gook. I feel embarrased and I hold back as long as I can.  So frustrating. I took pictures so we would have some wonderful memories. The little class room, all the fun stuff..Sigh..
Graduation was super cute and I was reminded of why Cambrea was such a good teacher and a wonderful person. I better go, I can feel my tears welling up again and I have a headache brewing. I will post pictures soon.

summer is almost here

School is almost out.  I am excited and ready for the break with my kids.  Except I start to feel this overwhelming sense of sadness as the year comes to an end.  I adore our teachers and next year will be new beginnings.  Our wonderful preschool teacher will be gone after this next weekend. She is moving to Utah, her husband got a wonderful job there. Her family is also there. I'm so happy for her but I can't help but be sad.  She was Mark's first teacher and Alec had her this year.  I had plans for Blake to have her as well.  She has been so good to my boys and they have learned so much. We found out a few Mondays ago she was leaving and right after that on Wednesday I got a letter from the academy saying Alec had been accepted.  I would have totally left him with her for another year.  I also would have lost my golden chance on him attending the academy.  Which I'm still not sure about. Mark has had such wonderful experiences at his school it makes it hard for me to pull him out and not send Alec there.

Mark's teacher has been wonderful. She is so kind and caring. One of those rarities anymore. She communicates with me and doesn't mind that I want to be involved.  Next year brings a new teacher and its always hard to say good bye.  I think I'm more upset than the kids.  When did I become so attached? So sentimental? Such a looney toon?
Its sad to think about.  Exciting for the kids but sad for me.  Here we go into the summer!

More thoughts

Did I ever mention I was 16 when I met Brandon? Kind of strange but it happened.  I know he hated that I was so young. He was 21.  He didn't like to take me anywhere because of my age. I guess now that I'm older I can agree. When he turned 22 I turned 17 nine days later.  It still wasn't great, but it was a tad bit better...Once he turned 23 and I turned 18 it wasn't that bad at all.  Two weeks after I graduated we were married. My dad had been working out of North Carolina and was only supposed to be visiting for my graduation.  So we planned the wedding around his trip here etc. He ended up moving back to Kingman so it all worked out anyways.  I'm not sure we would have waited given the situation....Now I'm 30 and he is 35 the ages are just a number that don't really matter..

So now my 16 year old niece is interested in a 22 year old guy..She will be 17 in September...Guess what, I HATE it..I mean he seems like a nice guy..but he is 22.  What interest does a 22 year old boy have in a 16 year old girl?! Then I think back to my situation and I remember how in Love I was...But things were so different then.  I was different, Brandon was different..He was so respectful of me...The joys of parenthood....
I keep telling her that every decision she makes has a consequence..I hope if I keep beating this into her head she will think about it..The sad thing is that this girl has seen more in her life than anyone at her age should ever have to.  Starting from the time she was a baby..Its just not cool...So here I sit pondering the situation and hoping she will think about all the things I have told her.